Now I Am An Author
I wrote the word “author” for the first time a few days back on my Twitter profile page. I experienced the same internal struggle when I first used the word “writer” to describe myself on business cards I had made a year and a half ago. I felt like a little girl trying to walk in my mom’s high heels.
But the truth is: I am an author whether I feel like one or not.
I got official word this week from my editor my first book, “A Place of Abundance” will be in bookstores and available for download on Kindle/Nook, etc in April 2014!! Somehow having a release date pushed me over the line to begin embracing this new role.
I have experienced similar feelings of inadequacy or unworthiness when I read some of God’s high calling of me in the Bible. Some descriptions are easier to embrace than others. Being referred to as a sheep (not the brightest animal), a worker in the harvest or a servant, is not a problem for me. But to fully take in that I am elevated to Daughter of the King (Princess, Royalty), Ambassador, Friend, Beloved because of being adopted into God’s family sometimes feels like a stretch.
But the truth is when I placed my trust in Jesus and gave Him my life, in that moment I was granted the privilege of adoption into God’s family. And as a child of God, I now had a new identity. And with this new relationship came everything.
What kind of difference would it make in how I carry myself, the decisions I make, how I think, and walk and move throughout my day if I lived out of who I truly am? Jesus did not need to prove anything, did not have power struggles, did not need to hoard, was not arrogant or insecure, He did not demand places of honor, titles, getting in the last word…
“Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come forth from God, and was going back to God, rose from supper, and laid aside His garments; and taking a towel, He girded Himself about. Then He poured water into the basin, and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded.” (John 13:3-5)
Jesus was able to give His life away and serve those He loved because all things had been given to Him. He walked in confidence knowing where He came from and where He was going.
Part of growth and character change comes from being comfortable with who God has made us and learning to walk in whatever path He leads. My path has good parts and hard parts, just like yours; times of joy, times of pain. Now part of God’s path for me includes being an author. This part feels quite “over my head.” So to push through these feelings which could cause me to quit or give up, I’m trying instead to hold onto the One who has led me thus far. As I look back, and as you look back, we can see His perfect faithfulness. Eyes on Him, and not on circumstances and leaning into Him and not my constantly changing feelings.
May we learn to live and serve out of the place of abundance that comes from knowing deeply all things have been given to us and this world is not our home.
What are some ways you have learned to embrace who God has made you? How do you deal with feelings of inadequacy?